Last week a close colleague had a going away party at her nice posh house (looked like a designer home). Her boyfriend has been living in London for 2 years, and has just extended his work contract so they decided it’s time for her to move to London to live together. She invited all her close work mates, including one mature lady who lived on her own with only the company of her beloved dog who ate only the best dog food available. She couldn’t make it though as she had to take her dog to the veterinarian that evening.
At my colleague’s house, we were greeted with so much food, wine and her adorable parents (who even cooked for us!). It was such a nice night spent with colleagues. Too bad she’s leaving. Although of course for her it meant being reunited with her lover. I suppose all is for the best. Nowadays no one really stays put that long in one place. A move would happen to someone sooner or later. There are still a few though, who prefer to live and work in their hometown. I guess I’m not one of them!
Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Dew. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!
This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.
On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.
She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.
Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.
Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.
I drove to office... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind... I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore.
Having said that though, I am not really much of a shopper. But, when I start, I really shop until I drop. Although I realize that I am not the best shopper particularly of baby presents. I find that each child is different and I don’t want to give the usual stuff that the baby may already have. I think a shop selling customized baby gifts would really be helpful during shopping dilemmas like these. Personalized gifts for baby would really be appreciated by the parents (also known as my friend/s) as they would feel that thought was given to choosing the best personalized new baby gifts.
When I was thinking what to buy my goddaughter of course I thought about getting her baby shoes, but then she’d just outgrow them. I ended up just getting her this really nice precious pearl earrings that were small enough to suit her baby ears, but big enough for her to use when she gets older. I really hope that she likes it.
"There are three sides to every story:
Your side, my side, and the truth.
And no one is lying.
Memories shared serve each differently."
So true. Sometimes we are so caught up with our own side of the story, that we forget to think about the other side. Truly there is another side.
.. Sometimes my memory is too good, I surprise myself!
I don't know when it started. I could have had it in me ever since (as if) but then I would have to say it is not in all areas. I am bad at trying to remember what I wore last week, or what I ate yesterday for breakfast, or that an old good friend had a mole in between her mouth and chin. Ordinarily I don't remember these details. There are a few funny stories about my memory lapse on these instances. I actually told that my friend (with the mole) that she had some dirt on her chin!!! I was embarrassed by this! Another instance I told my colleague she had dirt on her cheek! She said it was a permanent scar/scratch of some sort. I would say it so casually that I just forgot that I HAVE seen them (mole and scar) before!
But with travel, it is quite different. With airport and city codes and computer entries, and geography and maps, capital cities, etc. I have quite a good memory. I also am a bit quite good at memorising telephone numbers, passenger details, etc. I guess it's what is called selective memory?
Together with my siblings and cousins, I took piano lessons while doing ballet on the side. It was my mom’s ultimate goal for one of her children to be a pianist. I guess that wasn’t my long term plan. I took up piano lessons again later in my late elementary years but only to give me bad memories of my piano teacher flicking my fingers each time I made a mistake in playing my piece. My piano career ended with a grand recital. I don’t think I’ve touched the piano ever since.
Everyone in my family is a swimmer. Ever since I can remember, the water was introduced as a friend. To be honest I kind of loved this one. I’ve trained in varsity, competed at inter-level games, did even more training. Until I realized for myself I wasn’t really up for the whole competition thing. I swam because I liked it. Not because I had to be the fastest swimmer. That was the end of my early career as a swimmer. I now just enjoy lazing in the beach. Or, dipping in pools when I am on holidays. I plan to teach my kid (when I have them) to swim though.
During my pre-teens I took tennis lessons for two summers (while swimming). I had pent up energy that I guess I had to release at that moment in my life. I found it too unladly-like as my forearms were getting to muscular, I stopped. I had a relapse doing badminton, for a while, until I figured I was just kidding myself. Stuck in an airtight room sweating was not my thing. I probably did this coz I was crushing this badminton player at the country club.
As a young adult in my early university years, I took up guitar and voice lessons (on separate occasions). Again this was short lived. I was trying too hard, and the lessons made me feel obliged to attend. I could not sustain my interest in high notes and twisted fingers trying to make music with guitar strings. I ended up requesting for a refund for the remainder of my music term.
Through it all, I guess I tasted a bit of everything in my youth in terms of activities. I know of people who were never encouraged to get into sports, the arts or music. My parents overwhelmed me with all these opportunities. Until when I finally asked them to enroll me into French class. This tapped my soul. I was inclined to learn about culture, language and travel. This was even strengthened in college, when I had to take Spanish as an elective. Truly I knew I had a calling.
It was a long journey trying to tap what it was I was really interested in. However, no matter what I am thankful that I was able to get the best of everything. It all worked well, and I can now appreciate my parents’ efforts in exposing me to the activities while I was young.
In life, I guess there are things that we have to try at least, for us to know truly whether it is something we would pursue. Once we realize what is and what is not for us, only then can we move on to the next!
I was on my way to the airport, on a freezing, gloomy early morning. I was in a bit of a rush and still half asleep. Cabbie was already wide awake after taking his strong coffee, which I saw him just finish as I approached the Cab stand.
It was meant to be a quick drive to the airport. Usually about 15-20 minutes. It turned out to be 45 minutes. Yup, everyone wanted to take the airport route on that cold day.
Very much into the traffic, cabbie made convo with me. He was Asian as well. For some reason we ended up talking about each other's background (nothing too personal, just basic stuff), where are you from, how long have you been in Sydney, have you been back home, politics back home, etc. Later on, he mentioned that both him and his wife had to work. He said he had 2 kids. He asked if I had any, I said none. It was expensive to have kids. I got an eye opening comment from him. He said kids are not expensive. Money is nothing. He said, children need parents' time. If you have kids, you should be prepared to give them your time. And not leave the children with grandparents or day care centres. Wow. It's only 6AM and this stranger is talking sense already. I suppose I just didn't expect that talk at that time of the day. From a stranger to a stranger. It made me think. True enough it's not all about the money.
We went on talking about China's One child policy, etc. And finally, I got to the airport. It cost me a huge AUD 45 ! But you know what, I said to myself it was worth it. It's one of those conversations you have with a stranger that do make sense. I wish though that it costed me less!!
(Image from : http://www.yellowcabofsavannah.com/)
Having said all that memories and Noveau Riche University dramas, I am still a firm believer that everyone who can afford and is able, should get a Noveau Riche University degree of some sort. It is really the about the training and determination that one would need in real life. True, one doesn’t practice square roots and statistics in the real world. However, at the end of it all, life is all about the equation and balance you make of your life’s components.
In life, I suppose, there are times when we sift through information and pick up those that just relate to us at that particular time. For example, when I haven’t had any plans on going to Mauritius, I had no idea about what Mauritius had to offer in terms of tourism. When I was accepted to go on that trip, though, all information about Mauritius interested me. I could relate to news pertaining to weather, tourist attractions in that city. I suppose I would still come across certain information on Mauritius, but not just yet. I am glad though that I did grab the interest sooner rather than later!
I received my group certificate from my HR yesterday. Upon receiving my envelope I quickly opened it and was just so appalled with my withheld tax amount. It was a huge one. Huge enough to get a Round The World Business class ticket (speaking in Travel Agents lingo). I know where my tax goes to, but sometimes you'd just wish it wasn't that high. Imagine 30 percent of my salary is TAX! Isn't that SO exciting!! Only if I was getting a big refund amount, but NO, last year and the year before I only got about AUD 200 back. Out of AUD xx,000 I got AUD 200 back. Couldn't believe it. I tried this tax refund calculator.
- That I have a job (Hard times and there are people who dont even have a job)
- That things at work are getting better
- Coca Cola! I am trying to cut down on this. So, every time I have it, I cherish the moment :D
- The internet and other modern things that make my life a bit more interesting.
- Friends (I had lunch with a couple of friends this week and was able to catch up on the phone/YM to those who I couldnt meet up with)
- Chance to live in a somewhat peaceful country. (it saddens me though everytime I hear or read about political news on Manila)
Lately I haven't been able to sleep well, or sleep early. I have found a soothing companion during these restless nights. Badger Balm! :) I'm not sure where it can be bought in Sydney, as it was given to me. But it's helped me fall asleep (better).
I was looking whether they had a LoveAche Balm! That probably would be popular. It doesn't have to work. Sometimes it's all in the mind. (A thought ran across me now, what if you saw someone on the train or bus for example, carrying a Badger Balm LoveAche! :X hehe).
Participants: 1. Me and Mine 2.Creative In Me 3.Little Peanut 4. Pea in a Pod 5. Sugar Magnolias 6. All Things Me 7. Because Life Is Fun 8. Mind Bubbles 9. Something Purple 10. Stripe at Yellow 11. Vanity Kit 12. Em's Detour 13. Big Eyed Gal 14. The Chronic Shopper 15. Vital Sighs 16. Coriander Dreams
*First real job: Philippine Stock Exchange Employee
*First screen name: I honestly don't remember!!
*First funeral: my uncle's
*First pet: A fluffy white labrador
*First piercing: Ears
*First tattoo: I was never up for a tattoo. But I think I had a sticker one before......
*First credit card: My BPI credit card
*First kiss: ummmm.... a guy in grade school stole a kiss. Kissed me on the cheek!
*First enemy: A girl in pre-school who made fun of my pigtails! We never became friends. ;D
*Last car ride: Took a cab to work the other morning. I was running late....
*Last kiss: Hubby of course.
Pretty sure I'm one of the last ones to do this... So, grab this if you're one of the few who hasnt done this yet....
- My job, my means of livelihood - no matter how stressful it can be at times, at least I have one.
- My apartment - not the biggest, or the flashiest, but nonetheless it provides me shelter on winter days and nights
- Chocolates and Ice Creams - I had quite a few of this this week
- Quiet nights - Peaceful sound of silence
- Television - Keeps me company at times
- Family and Friends in Manila - I am missing them so much