When the kids are older

Sometimes I find myself daydreaming about getting my life back - when the kids are older. Although part of me, of course, wants time to stop them from growing up too fast. However, part of me also wants to enjoy them already (and get a bit of me time, too!). At the moment, my time management skills are super messed up, my organising skills are nearly non-existent. The house is usually a mess, my under eyes are the darkest shade ever, hubby sleeps in a different room - while myself and the kids in ours, we can't travel long drives as the little one hates car rides... the list goes on about what a having a young family entails. But I love it in a lot of ways than one. But for now, I am indulging in my daydream. Fast forward to 4 years from now. The little ones in school, and I am back to earning some moolah - contributing to our family funds (oooh and that BIG Trip in 4 years!).

Sometimes I daydream about:

- Having the Christmas tree decors properly put - and stay put for the duration of the holiday period! (at the moment, for the past 6 years - our eldest puts up the decors first - then I put them back up tidy-er).

- Sleeping in!!!! Weekends are a must, and maybe one or two mornings during the week too!
Ok, even just a proper full sleep. My last proper sleep was in 2008!!!!!

- Do my own thing in the toilet and shower - alone - without it being a whole family affair!

- Cooking because I want to, and because I enjoy it - rather than rushing to cook and feed the brood.
Oh, and cooking with both my arms/hands free. (Nowadays, I have a permanent back and side pain coz I carry little L while I cook - while I clean, while I do a LOT of things) (With one hand).

- Just do nothing. And have time to be bored. (Nowadays, I rarely have that quiet 'me' time where I don't have to think of too many things all at once). (I usually rush things because I sneak 'me' time in between the little one's naps)

- Do something uninterrupted.

- Have 'me' time during the day!!! (Nowadays 'me' time happens late at night when the kids are asleep) (I end up falling asleep too on some nights!)

- I want to travel more. With the family. But also, sneak in a getaway with my girlfriends who I haven't seen in ages!

- Make a weekly menu - and stick to it! (Not be too tired midweek to follow through what my menu says)

- Go on a date with hubby. (I am not comfortable leaving our little one with my sister to babysit - until maybe she's about 4 years old).

- Have time to properly groom myself (have time to be meticulous about my face, hair, clothes, etc). Nowadays, this is always rushed - so I only get to do the basics (if I am lucky!).

I am sure I can think of a lot more. For now, these are what comes to mind. One day!

http://www.lamamaonline.com/secondary.asp?id=1110&print=true

the Balikbayan Route

Today I came across this Facebook Page, the Balikbayan Route and once again I missed Manila noise! There are days I think I would like to live back home again. However hubby reminds me that if we move back we wouldn't have access to what the Aus government can offer. Quality of air isn't good (especially downtown), the lifestyle is different (Manila malls vs Sydney parks). And this is in addition to the other many things to consider..................

Ok, but I tell hubby we will live in the province (if Tagaytay and Cavite is considered one!) to avoid the chaos in Manila but at the same time still be within three (!!) hours drive. Why can't life be simple and have all my loved ones in one country. Let alone one city. Big sigh. Growing up and the facts of life.

At the end of the day, we strive to give the best to our children (current and future) and hope and pray that we are happy with most of our decisions so that the journey of life will be enjoyable. C'est la vie.

Source

Bursting with Ideas

A long time ago my mom told me I was hyperactive, just like my dad who never sits still. I thought to myself that couldn't be. I am very calm, collected and reserved. But I guess, over the years I kind of understood what my mom meant. Like my dad, I am full of ideas, bursting with new thoughts, plans, activities, business ideas, ventures, and the list goes on... forever!

I cannot imagine the life of a person running out of ideas. Sure, I hit a dead end every once in a while. By choice I stop from thinking further, but really I sometimes think I am overflowing with new things to do, accomplish and create.

Source

Sigh. And it is very tiring. Tiring not because the ideas are running out, but tiring because I feel I don't have time to do all of these. I am a thinker. And so as much as I would like to put it all into action, there are only 24 hours in a day. One step at a time, I would like to achieve as much of my ideas into something. Sometimes I wish I didn't have to sleep to avoid running out of time to DO! But of course I need sleep in order to function the next day! As a mum this is important of course for my family to thrive!

I have endless lists. Sometimes creating a list makes me feel good because I am made to believe that I would do this one day. Go through the list and just DO IT. If only I had the time!

So, yes I guess I am a hyperactive thinker. Give me a paper and pen and I can jot a whole note-full of thoughts, doodles, scribbles and ideas. My mum was right after all (aren't they almost always!)

Nerdies at heart

Me and hubby are secretly nerdies at heart. At home during our down time we watch David Attenborough's specials on animals, nature, planet factoids. Sometimes we just watch any other documentary (we previously recorded) about the beginnings of life on Earth, planets and space. Other times we watch about docus on modern life, modern infrastructure and buildings, evolution of human life, other species, human culture and behaviour. Sometimes we watch about current events or special shows on refugees, immigration, travel and discovery.

This is one way hubby and I bond - over documentaries that interest us both. We find ourselves engrossed intellectually - discussing 'quietly' or as we watch along. Sometimes we are 'too relaxed' while watching and end up snoozing side by side, only to restart the show the next day.

(okay, occasionally when we are homesick we do bond over cheesy Filipino flicks or Filipino drama)

I really should share some of the interesting stories featured in some of the shows we watch... Hmm...

In the meantime, we are in search for a tv series to watch... Last time we dutifully followed a series was back in the day of "Lost" and Heroes" (oh and my Gossip Girl days).



From zazzle.com.au

Creating circles

We all have our own circle of friends. Some we just fell into as we grew up.. We lived across the street from them, or we met them at school or at work. Some we've met through common friends, cousins, siblings, etc. Some of them we ended up being best friends with, or have dated once or twice..

But as we grow older, there are some circles we draw ourselves. We have a choice now. We don't just fall into these circle by accident, or because of our family. Living overseas makes it a challenge to build long lasting circles of friendships. However, when we do find that circle where we belong it forms our support group.

I find that I have always been the type of person who creates lots of circles. Admittedly, I don't always engage myself fully in each of them. Some circles are purely for circles sake. Some circles I have to maintain now, not just for me, but for my little one. The circles I put her in forms part of her. Without having cousins or siblings around, I endeavour to make her have meaningful circles. Relationships. Yes, those circles form our relationships. Only if we let them close enough to reach that level.

Photo from http://www.wallpaperhere.com/Nature/Other/Water_Drops_Circle_of_Life_72793

I am grateful for all my friendships especially those that have been through it all with me.

Since then

Hubby's given me the talk.. I've been too whingey lately and it's sending him not pleasant signals that the novelty of having a baby is gone. Admittedly, I have been whingeing too much. And I feel bad that maybe little B is sensing it... Bad vibes.. So, I have and am, making a conscious effort to be positive and not whinge. Much. Much less. Especially when it comest to me selfishly wanting me time. To work. (Have realised that as much as I am a career oriented person, I am a mum now. And a wife.)

So, here's my top three thoughts/motivations to keep me from slipping back to my old whingey self:

Photo from http://creativethursday.typepad.com/my_weblog/2007/03/growing-up.html

1. The little girl now won't stay little for too long. She is beginning to be communicative, and that just makes her all the more irresistible. In other words, as much as she is testing my patience big time, she is just being herself = cheeky baby. This stage won't last long, before you know it, she's spending more time with her friends than me.

2. Work can wait. Having decided to have a baby is a lifelong commitment. It's about sacrificing, knowing priorities. At the moment, we may not have all the spare moolahs to spend, but at the end of the day little B just wants me and her dadda's time, love and attention. The occasional new toys are just perks. But really, quality time spent together is priceless. In a few years, we can get back on track with our savings. For now, enjoy the moment.

3. Keeping it simple is the key to (my) happiness. (my decision and definition of happiness). One day at a time, one step at a time. There's plenty to do, but it all starts with small steps. Every step of the way will lead to something worthwhile.

I am thankful for hubby's not-so-gentle reminder. Sometimes it's just what I need. A verbal whack in the head.

Ideally this would be me

Ya, ya ya, the picture I wish was me working at home. Poised, composed, neat.

But not!

Since officially starting work at home last week, I have been calm, but not poised. The house is a mess. I guess I am just about to make my (our) routine. Not as easy. A baby does not have the best routine. But I suppose that should not throw me off my goal. Working from home would work, and I will make sure it does.

Although it means being able to time my calls in B's good, silent moods. Checking and replying to emails quickly. Doing my research with one hand feeding B, while the other is typing away.

Well of course this only happens in the beginning. Things will be better. Before I know it the little one is not so little anymore, and I would have mastered the art of juggling my time. For now, I look at the photo above and feel hopeful that everything is possible. After all, (its my secret) I am supermom! Hahaha!

I still keep coming back

No matter how busy I am I will always be back online sooner or later. Whether that is to update my online journal, search the net for Venetian Masquerade masks, do some travel works, etc. Much of my world revolves around the internet, just like more than half of the world's population today. Hubby and I were talking the other week about how much the world relied on technology, particularly the internet. Should the entire internet 'network' fail there would definitely be chaos everywhere. Truly there is more to the net than doing online shopping and searching for Venetian Face masks.

Autumn Chill

We are still a month away from Winter and it is too cold!! I literally have three layers of clothing on me + my super thick blanket, but I am still cold! Why??!! I know in other parts of the world, eg, Manila they are experiencing some heat wave (obviously due to summer). I am now really wanting to go some place warm, tropical, hot, anywhere but here!!

At this time of the year I am contemplating about moving to Queensland where it is most of the time tolerable weather.. Hubby is not considering this anymore, since he is pretty happy with our current city. I reckon we could migrate north for six months during winter!!

Is there some sort of 'heat' dance to do? I know there is the 'sun' dance to try to attract sunshine. Oh well, I should just another layer of clothing.

Healthy change

I have never been the best at trying to live a healthy life. Well, until recently when I turned thirty. I decided it was time for a change. Now, I am more conscious about the salt that I put in our meals, I am trying to serve more vegetables in the table, and even trying to have at least two or three fruits a day! My work mate was even trying to convince me about the benefits of taking up a lemon diet. She said to have warm water with freshly squeezed lemon in the morning is good for one's health. Well, I told her it's quite difficult since I am not an early riser and my mornings are usually in a rush but I said I would try. At least the good thing is I am more knowledgeable about the good and bad food which I should and should not eat. Likewise, I know that there are good food supplements such as Beta Glucan which are out there to assist with having a healthy body.

City Leaving

..Okay, Not!

I am wishful thinking, dreaming about trees, greens, leaves, open space, nature, away from the city! Somehow these cravings creeped up, to think I considered myself a self confessed city girl from the beginning.

When travelling, do you find yourself visiting cosmopolitan cities? I guess, to an extent I still enjoy seeing new skyscrapers and the city skyline. But recently I find myself being drawn to take photos of bugs upclose, or patiently trying to capture a kingfisher bird in a still shot. I like framing my photos to reflect on the natural elements of my trip.

I enjoy looking up the sky and snapping my Canon 40D (see photo insert of tree and sky).

I guess once in a while we really need to leave the city to enjoy the things we know we are missing.

Kaleidoscope Me

I start the day as God's wonderful creature.

Rush through breakfast, as a human being in need of food.

Run to my bus stop, get on the bus, start work, as an employee.

Do my job, as a consultant, a travel professional in my industry.

I have a bit of lunch break, get on the phone to my good friend, to her I am a confidant.

I work through my day, cajoling and interacting with people, as a colleague.

At the end of the work day, I turn off my pc, and switch back to my plain me.

I run and catch my bus home, read my lecture notes on the bus, I am a student again.

I get home, cook dinner, switch on my 'wife mode' me.

After dinner, I relax a bit, watch tv, sit in front of my laptop, I am a cyber techie gal.

Just about to sleep, I switch back on my God's wonderful creature plain old me.

Head off to dreamland, until the following day when I embark on another kaleidoscope me.

Still about tightening one's belt

So far (as a nation) we still haven't hit rock bottom yet in terms of the financial crisis. We are still in that low trough of things, and can't loosen the belt just yet.In my household, we are still just cutting back on DVD rentals, restaurant dining, shopping sprees, etc.One of my friends who's got a big family (four children) all of whom are schoolaged children, are currently studying the option of quick easy payday loans that are available to them. She's saying they are still weighing options and aboutto decide whether this is the way to go. We were discussing that times like thiscall for serious thoughts on finances.

Family and Food

Oh how I wish I was in Manila now spending weekly dinners out with my family, or going on out of town trips with them. Or, even just to spend at least a weekend with them once a month is enough for now. (hehe).


My family just loves trying the new restaurant in town. We live right smack in the middle of Ortigas Center that's why. Being one with the city is a way of life, a part of our system. Should I say WAS. But, really I know I will always be a city girl, anywhere or wherever I am.


Anyway, I am missing them at the moment. Start of a brand new year can possibly do that to one. On an early gloomy, quiet saturday it can. Maybe cause I am about to marinade our grilled pork lunch, and I am wishing I could have lunch out instead. But of course, going out for meals in Sydney is a luxury one should sparingly indulge in otherwise go broke. Or, maybe I just wish someone could clean dishes for me, or set the table. Not. These are probably just my way of missing family and home. And, the countless conversations we have over Japanese, Thai, Filipino, or whatever cuisine. Or, even just home prepared bread, adobo/etc flavour tuna in jar (? forgot what its called), salad, cabanossi, olives, cheese and wine. We were never conventional in this way as my mum is not a big cook although she claims to be. So, most of the time we have takeaway or eat out next door (at the mall).

Anyway, I have to do my porkchop now.

Why do we need girl-friends?

And I don't mean lovers.

(coming from another girl).

We need someone to bitch with. Especially when it involves a current's EX.

We need someone to cry with. Especially after that big break up.

We need someone to call when we have that Lalala mood.

We need someone to remind us when enough is enough.

We need someone to share dramas with.

We need someone to share our giddy moments with.

We need someone to ask an honest question, to get an honest answer back.

We need someone to go for pedicures and manicures with.

We need someone to pep talk us.

We need someone to be there for us, someone who can be truly happy for us.

We need someone to enjoy girltalk with.

We need someone to witness our big day.

Moreso,

We need someone, to be able to be a someone (a girl friend) back.

... all about me (again!) :)

...i love making lists
...i love to travel, but i hate airplane rides
...i love daydreaming about the future..my future family, future vacations, future anything
...i love chocolates! milk chocolates...not dark bitter ones...white chocolates, maybe sometimes...
...i like beach trips. but i dont like getting dark...
...i like taking long and hot showers...
...i like mellow, soothing sounds
...ive always thought of playing jazz/blues music in my apartment, with dim mood lights, chilling and just wasting time...lounging on a big lazy couch...with the aircon turned on, and my big warm blankie...
...i like reading about showbiz chatter! to forget about my own life concerns just for a moment
...i like watching movies!either in the theatre, dvds played at home..
...i love rooftops and views...
...i like planning vacations, day trips, even if i have a feeling it might not push through!
...i like sulking sometimes. i feel better afterwards! crazy me,,,
...i like collecting brochures of sorts...i think i could fill a whole closet already!
...i like buying bags... sometimes i have to convince myself that i dont have room for any anymore.
...i lik e people watching, sometimes.. just sit on the park bench and watch the world go by...
...i like mcdo chicken nuggets...with BBQ and Sweet and Sour Sauce. I always buy 2 sauces!
...i like going on a ferry ride... on a hot summer day... cruising on the harbour...keeping quiet..
...i like going to loud music bars, ocncerts, once in a while..it gives me a natural high during and after...
...i like balconies and views...
...i like krispy kreme, marble frost....
...i love long weekends and public holidays
...i could sleep all day if i could...
...i dont mind being alone sometimes... sometimes, i wouldnt want to be alone...
...i have a mental list of names that i would like for my baby someday...
...i hate winter weather... gloomy days, cold nights
...i like peeking into other people's thoughts about things...
...i used to like opening emails, until i started getting too many work related ones!

On being a Team

Okay, we've been told by our Manager that we've got quite a special team. We all get along really well, and are so united to a fault sometimes. That's what happens when you put a bunch of girls together in a seemingly un-structured environment where our only source of morale boost is each other. Really. We made it through six months without a leader to guide us. Considering our team was built less than a year ago, myself being the most senior and the only founding member left in the team. We had a leader come and step in for about a few weeks but she did not last long for reasons I am sure we are not responsible for.

From a group previously composed of Four, we now have one new lady join us yesterday. So now we are Five. It may be a tactic of management to break into our solid teamwork. Not that we have not been reaching our targets while maintaining that high quality service because we have been doing pretty well and our figures can prove so.

But anyway, we are Five now. We would be evolving to a different mixture with our new team member. And only time will tell whether we will all gel constructively the way we used to. Nevertheless, work needs to be done. And whether we get on or not, work is something we do well and take seriously. Life goes on. C'est la vie.

How to save up for that Trip and Live Healthy

Especially during this trying time. One can only try to think up of ways to save. And be healthy!

Cut down on junk food and soft drinks.
Not only would one get to save a about thirty dollars a month, but also lose a bit of tummy bulge to be able to get ready for that beach holiday.
Approximate saving per month: $30.

Walk at least thirty minutes a day.
If one lived within an easy walk to work, it is smart and healthy to get exercise. Walk either to work, or from work at least three times a week, or more if one is not pressed with time. A good way to cut transportation cost, save on petrol, and get that lazy bum to walk.
Approximate saving per month: $40.

Drop your gym membership.
One can easily save big bucks by getting into shape the economical way. One need not be a member of Fitness First, or Gold’s Gym or whatever. We’d only need to stick to our daily regimen of walking, jogging and we’d be keeping fit and losing weight in no time. Truly being healthy does not have to be expensive. It is better to use hard earned moolah towards a much deserved holiday.
Approximate saving per month: $70.

Give your plastics a break.
I know some people enjoy retail therapy so much, but revert to being stressed again once the credit card bill comes in. Really, one does not need a new pair of jeans, shirt, underwear, shoes every week. Perhaps indulge every other month or two, maybe. But not on a weekly basis.
Approximate saving per month: $100.

Cook at home. Bring lunch to work.
I don’t know anyone who does not appreciate home cooked meals. They are a lot cheaper to prepare, way healthier (without too much salt, or MSG, or other unhealthy ingredients that restaurants or fast food put into your meal). Aside from hubby appreciating your time spent cooking that delicious and healthy food, you get to save.
Approximate saving per month: $250.

At the end of the month, if you’ve been good, imagine having an extra $500 to spend towards that dream holiday. I know not everyone may appreciate that weekend away over something material (eg, hotel and spa pampering versus new camera). However, if you are a travel buff like myself, you would think up ways to save up for that goal: holiday! Come to think of it, spending wisely leads to a healthy lifestyle as well. Now, it is just a matter of putting to action all these nice things!

Laptop Break

I Can't wait to get my internet connected!! Finally (cross fingers) I get it set up by tomorrow night!! :) It's just so annoying that I can't open up and read my blogger friends' blog updates with different windows open, while I check email, read online Filipino news, and my Pinoy showbiz,etc!

I have to admit I enjoyed giving my laptop a bit of a break. I was able to catch up on sleep. I think almost every day I was asleep way before midnight. I was awake as well by about 7 or 8 am. I have let go of a lot of blog opportunities and entries I said I would do, but then again I don't regret it (much). I know I would live another day without net. I guess when you don't have a choice then you just have to live with that fact.

Oh well.

I have also gone to a couple of places, picnics, night outs with friends and colleagues and of course boyfriend. I guess every once in a while we all need a break from the online world. I had mine, for the year! So, next hiatus would hopefully be not until next year. HAHA.

Using this one everyday

How many great inventions of this modern world do we take for granted? I for one used to neglect Toshiba laptops and their greatness. You see, I love using my laptop in bed. It’s not the best of habits, as it nurtures a bad posture and gives me back aches often times, but I am sometimes lazy to type using my good old computer table. When I was researching about the best laptop to purchase I considered the weight and screen quality of the unit. Also, initially I was doing a price comparison to see which laptop would give me the best run for my money considering I am on it everyday. I was happy with my old one until I was given a new one as a present. My new laptop is a lot better than my old Toshiba as it is still fairly new, and the screen is glossy. The only thing I am not that happy about is the screen size. It is a bit too small (than my old one), but of course this means it is a lot lighter in weight as well so I should not really complain about it.