School holidays countdown

Finally we are in the last week of the two-week long school holidays! It has been a long week so far and thus the countdown starts now. Luckily we have had an okay weather (some days cloudy - at least not raining!) so we had a few days of park playing. Sometimes I try to keep the kids busy by doing some crafts, playing some music (inspired by musicians friend drums), and other times just letting them be bored. I read an article before that boredom is good for kids because it exercises their imagination. And so I let them be bored once in a while!

Off to get some sleep now, as we have a play date activity tomorrow! Counting down to 5 more days of no school!

Change is happening

For SO long all I wanted was for little miss to have a sibling. I come from a huge family and would have wanted to have a big family too-but I started having kids quite late in my adult life....

After losing our little boy last year I yearned to try for another baby when I was ready and this year it happened. I am now at 37 weeks and ready to pop anytime now! A girl again this time. As much as I miss our little angel- I am still trying to accept the surreal reality that I may actually be bringing home our baby this time. Soon. There are still some raw emotions I think which I will have to deal with when this baby comes out and as much as I am trying to just take things one thing at a time and not overthink it is difficult.

I am wondering what kind of change I would have to go through when we have another addition to the family. Surely lots of changes will happen. And ideally here are some changes I hope to achieve for the best:

*Routine- Having a daughter already start school I have had a bit of a routine going for the family for a while now. This will change and hopefully I would get to incorporate a good new routine eventually while keeping what we already have been doing. Tweaking here and there I guess especially in the beginning.

*Freedom- I've had some freedom for a while now after going on a break from the 'corporate' world in 2014. I know I will encounter a 'shock' of some sort when my recently acquired freedom will cease to exist for another 5 years. Someone will depend on me 24/7 again- clinging to me and depending on me for everything small and big. I will have to activate that extra 'sense' and mother's instinct overdrive again. It's a different extra 'sense' when there is a newborn involved, and a different one with a school age child I think. I need to be 'extra sensitive' again as a mum. If that makes sense.

*Physically- I expect to be more tired (yet again). I will have 3 people to look after, after all! And a house to keep, meals to prepare, etc! I will need to get that extra vitamin boost I think!

*Emotionally- As with all births there is an emotional and hormonal change happening immediately and sometimes not so immediate after delivery. I would have to be open to the change that would follow the physical change happening with the family. New dynamics within our family would take place and learned.

*Time Management- I hope to be able to manage my time better with a new little one. I know the mistakes I have committed when our first was born and hopefully I would have learned how to go about with better this time around! I have to think strategically and think up ways to save me precious time!

*Effort- This would be a big change. If in the past I could wing it here and there, I guess having another little person would mean I would have to be wiser in my efforts and choosing priorities.

*Priorities- Linked with everything above I would have to adjust my mindset and choose my priorities wisely. Obviously it would be good to have some sort of income coming in while I am on leave caring for the new little one, but I should have that same focus when we had our first born where I could anticipate how she was feeling even before she felt it. And I have to be ahead of the game once again.

Oh the life as a parent- as a mum! Always full of challenges, changes and planning involved!

the Balikbayan Route

Today I came across this Facebook Page, the Balikbayan Route and once again I missed Manila noise! There are days I think I would like to live back home again. However hubby reminds me that if we move back we wouldn't have access to what the Aus government can offer. Quality of air isn't good (especially downtown), the lifestyle is different (Manila malls vs Sydney parks). And this is in addition to the other many things to consider..................

Ok, but I tell hubby we will live in the province (if Tagaytay and Cavite is considered one!) to avoid the chaos in Manila but at the same time still be within three (!!) hours drive. Why can't life be simple and have all my loved ones in one country. Let alone one city. Big sigh. Growing up and the facts of life.

At the end of the day, we strive to give the best to our children (current and future) and hope and pray that we are happy with most of our decisions so that the journey of life will be enjoyable. C'est la vie.

Source

One step at a time - licence alert!

A lot of things in life (mainly about achieving goals) involve starting with the first step. Going steady, maybe slowly, eyes on the goal mini-steps.

This week I achieved something which i have been pushing aside, delaying, avoiding, and for some odd reason - just have not wanted to get - no matter how much I say I have wanted to. Nearly 12 years in the making (see this post).... finally got my learner's driving licence!!!! And, to think I actually KNOW how to drive (I used to be a truck driving lady in Manila!).

Ok, so that's over and done with (No less than a perfect score of 45/45 in the computer knowledge test!). Now onto the real thing - the driving test. Gulp. Big gulp. Okay, it should really be no biggie - but nearly everyone I know says everyone fails the driving test the first time around!! Triple Gulp.

I got my Migration Licence many years back (after one full year of studying law), I had a baby (but yes I thought going through labour pains would be easier than getting my driver's licence!). All these and many more I felt was easier to achieve than the NSW driver's licence.

Well hopefully this small step is the pre cursor to getting my full licence sooner than later! I don't think I can wait another 10 odd years for that!!

Out of time

 

So much so do and always so little time to action! I don’t know if it’s just me and my (lack of) time management or whether I am being short changed by time. 24 hours seems to be just not enough to do everything I want or need to do. I am re-reading Purpose Driven Life again and I am reminded about my priorities in life... Still I can’t seem to cope. Life is going by way too fast! I wish I have an extra couple of hours just to “run my errands”. Errands which are really things that only I can do the way I want done. C’est la vie.

Somehow I am reminded of the movie with JT and Amanda Seyfried "In Time." Really, time is a sometimes felt like a commodity we are always wanting more of and never seem to have enough of. I liked that movie. I suppose I should watch it again now and it might shed some new thoughts on my current chaotic sense of time. Hmm - note for the weekend!! *Yes, if I actually find time to watch it!*

 

Revisiting an old photo of mine from 2011

So much for something

It's 6AM and 9 degrees (C) outside. I've been awake for about 2 hours now. Somehow I am now thinking about the following weeks to come and the unexpected change that is about to happen. All for the best of course, is what we are all hoping for.

An opportunity knocked at my door a couple of months ago, but I declined it then. There were lots of things going on and change back then would have just rocked our boat big time. Uncertainty can do that sometimes. It was a tough choice to make since this was something I have been wanting to pursue (maybe for at least 12 years now!). But then timing was just so wrong, or so I thought it was. For all I know I was resisting too much something that was meant to be. I struggled deep inside to not take this chance even if I wanted it so bad.

Now, this same opportunity fell on my lap again last week. Quite unexpectedly. And this time around it will happen. I am longing for the less stressful work environment and the great hours.

Taking this opportunity means I have had to put on hold a few business plans for a while. I am praying so hard though that this is the right decision. I guess something that's blessed on you cannot be bad and can only lead to even better things. Surely when the timing is right the universe will conspire and inspire you to not resist the flow.

Since then

Hubby's given me the talk.. I've been too whingey lately and it's sending him not pleasant signals that the novelty of having a baby is gone. Admittedly, I have been whingeing too much. And I feel bad that maybe little B is sensing it... Bad vibes.. So, I have and am, making a conscious effort to be positive and not whinge. Much. Much less. Especially when it comest to me selfishly wanting me time. To work. (Have realised that as much as I am a career oriented person, I am a mum now. And a wife.)

So, here's my top three thoughts/motivations to keep me from slipping back to my old whingey self:

Photo from http://creativethursday.typepad.com/my_weblog/2007/03/growing-up.html

1. The little girl now won't stay little for too long. She is beginning to be communicative, and that just makes her all the more irresistible. In other words, as much as she is testing my patience big time, she is just being herself = cheeky baby. This stage won't last long, before you know it, she's spending more time with her friends than me.

2. Work can wait. Having decided to have a baby is a lifelong commitment. It's about sacrificing, knowing priorities. At the moment, we may not have all the spare moolahs to spend, but at the end of the day little B just wants me and her dadda's time, love and attention. The occasional new toys are just perks. But really, quality time spent together is priceless. In a few years, we can get back on track with our savings. For now, enjoy the moment.

3. Keeping it simple is the key to (my) happiness. (my decision and definition of happiness). One day at a time, one step at a time. There's plenty to do, but it all starts with small steps. Every step of the way will lead to something worthwhile.

I am thankful for hubby's not-so-gentle reminder. Sometimes it's just what I need. A verbal whack in the head.

Why Sleep

The past couple of ___ (months/years?) I've been missing good sleep. And I mean, honest to goodness long and uninterrupted zzzs. Oftentimes when the little one is asleep, I try to catch up with work or aimlessly search for stuff on the net. I know I should put to good use the free time to rest. But no, I find myself lost in tons of things to do besides lie in bed.

Photo from http://ecoki.com/sleep-remedies/

I wonder when I'd get to enjoy sleeping again. Sleep in til mid-day both on a saturday and sunday.. I suppose, just like everything else I will get it back in a couple of years. For now, I should be happy that I get to sneak out of my mummy duties for a couple of hours every day. C'est la vie.

0100 Truths

It's been a very long while since I've done this...

100 truths.

What was your…




1. Last beverage — Water



2. Last phone call — My sister.



3. Last text message — My dad.


4. Last song you listened to — Oh Well.


5. Last time you cried — Shed a tear, this morning. At the airport. Cried, as in big cry ... don't remember.



Have you ever…



6. Dated someone twice — Yes, of course.



7. Been cheated on — Yes, emotionally.



8. Kissed someone and regretted it — Nope. But the other way around. Did not kiss someone, and regretted it. Haha! But not anymore!!



9. Lost someone special — Yes. A few times.


10. Been depressed — Yes, I guess we all go through that somehow.



List favorite colors:



11. Aquamarine


12. Old Rose



13. Light Yellow


14. Gray (not exactly a colour)



This year (2011), have you…



15. Made a new friend — Yes.



16. Fallen out of love — Nope.



17. Laughed until you cried — Oh yes, there were a few times.



18. Met someone who changed you — Not this year! Or, not yet!


19. Found out who your true friends were — I've known who my true friends are for a while now.


20. Found out someone was talking about you — So far, I have yet to find out!



21. Any regrets — I try not to. Sometimes it's an effort.


General:



22. Prized possession: Our wedding ring/engagement ring.


23. Hobby: Doing nothing! For a change. Am a busy bee otherwise.



24. Do you have any pets? — No pets in this household. Sadly.


25. Do you want to change your name? — Nope, I am pretty much happy with my unique name.

26. What did you do on your last birthday - Spent the day at home, with the little one. Then, come evening
with hubby.


27. What time did you wake up today? — 7AM



28. What were you doing at midnight last night — Working.


29. Name something you cannot wait for — I cannot wait for next summer! Just warm sunshine with a two year old would be exciting...


30. Last time you saw your mother — Last month.



31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life? — Occassionally I think I would like to change a few things. But I suppose, things and events and people happen for a reason. So, I'd rather not mess up with that. Answering the question though, I wish I had me and hubby's family live in the same city as us.


32. What makes you sad? – Thinking about not spending enough time with family (obviously coz they are not around)



33. Your happiness — A very lazy weekend. Lunch by the wharf, movie marathon with hubby, spend half an hour at the park with the little one. On a very nice sunny warm weekend.


34. What’s getting on your nerves right now? — Slow Technology! Slow laptop!


35. Most visited webpage — Facebook


37. Food that I avoid: Chocolates. But, I usually succumb to temptation.


37. Nicknames — I'd rather not share.


38. Relationship Status — Married.


39. Zodiac sign — Aquarius



40. What do you wear on a nightout? — Hmm, I don't remember when the last one was! But I would probably wear blouse/jeans, or a dress + tights.


41. What do you wear to a casual lunch? Casual dress

42. What do you wear on a bad day? — I wear my hair up, baggy clothes.


43. Fashion Icon — None really.


44. Hair color — Tired brown. Would love to have some colour done tho: one shade of brown lighter.


45. Favorite brother – Both of them! Hahaha.


46. Height — 5 foot 2


47. Do you have a crush on someone? Yes, but they don't know me. And they live in a different world. Yes, hubby knows about this!


48: What do you like about yourself? I usually like that I am a go-getter. Recently though, I've been having a few issues due to my time constraint/limitations thats not under my control.


49. Workout: Balancing the baby, doing the dishes, and working.


50. Tattoos — None.



51. Righty or lefty? — Dominantly a righty. But I can do some curvies on my left too.


Firsts:



52. First surgery — Giving birth.


53. First piercing — First and only - ears.



54. First best friend — Joyce.


55. First sport you joined — Swimming.


56. First vacation — Baguio with my family.


57. First kiss – My second boyfriend.


58. First pair of trainers — Don't remember!!


Right now:



59. Eating — Chocolates. So unhealthy!


60. Drinking — Lots of water.


61. I’m about to — Have dinner.


62. I’m listening to — The sound of silence.


63. Waiting for — the little girl to wake up.


Your future:



64. Want kids? — I want another one! Sooooon.


65. Get married? — Check.


66. Career? — I am really wanting my travel biz and migration biz to work out well.


Which is better…



67. Lips or eyes ? — Eyes


68. Hugs or kisses ? — Hugs, then kisses.


69. Shorter or taller? — Taller.


70. Older or younger? — Would have preferred an older one, but I manage to always end up with someone younger!


71. Romantic or spontaneous? — Romantic. Not so much a spontaneous person, at heart I will always be a planner.


72. Nice stomach or nice arms? — Nice arms!!


73. Sensitive or loud? — Sensitive please.


74. Hook-up or relationship? — Is this even a question? Definitely a relationship.


75. Devil or angel? — Angel please.


Have you ever…



76. Kissed a stranger? — Never.


77. Drunk hard liquor? — Not in a very very very long while.


78. Lost glasses/contacts? — Nope..



79. Sex on first date? — Nope.


80. Broken someone’s heart? — I think I have. Maybe a few times. More or less. More.


81. Had your heart broken? — Oh yes.


82. Been arrested? — No.



83. Turned down someone you love? I don't know if it was love. But yes, I have turned down someone because of Love.


84. Fallen for a friend? — I think so.



85. Raison d’ Etre? — To be happy.


Do you believe in…



86. Yourself? — Not my strongest moment now, but yes, I try to.


87. Miracles? — A big YES.


88. Love at first sight? — I think so!!


89. Heaven? — Yes.



90. Santa Claus? — Yes!


91. Kiss on the first date? — Well, no.


92. Angels? — Yes.



Answer truthfully…



93. Do you still think about past loves? — I think every once in a while, we all do.


94. Did you start your day with a prayer?  I try to.


95. Did you sing today? — Yup.



96. Who was the one that got away? — Well, I'd like to think he let me go.


97. If you could go back in time, how far would you go, and why? 1990. I'd love to re-live high school and college days in Manila. They were the best.


98. If you could pick a day from last year and relive it, what would it be? — The day I gave birth.


99. Are you afraid of falling in love again? — Why would it happen again?


100. Posting this as 100 truths? — YES!

Driving mad

Hubby was driving us to the mall last week, and there was this car that swerved in front of us quite scarily. Good thing it was not in the side of the car where our little girl is seated, but either way it gave us a bit of sudden shock. It happened all too fast! I don't fully understand how comprehensive our insurance policy was, but I knew I did not want to have to contact an Austin Personal Injury Lawyer for whatever reason it might be! I was glad that hubby didn't flare up because of the instance, although if something happened at least I have the contact details of the company: O’Hanlon, McCollom & Demerath – Personal Injury Lawyers – 808 West Avenue, Austin, TX. 78701 – 512-494-9949.

Trying on dresses

THIS DRESS?
Photo from Eidress.com

.. In my dreams! I wonder what that means? Does it have anything to do with the impending domicile move? Or is it signifying a need for a career change? Hmm.

Or maybe, it means I need to buy more dresses! Shopping!! (Not)

Occasionally we dream about things, people, places, and other stuff. Sometimes we forget even what the dream was about, but sometimes we remember.

Last night, for me, it was about attending a college friend's wedding. I was trying on some dresses to wear. Whether I wanted the black polka dot dress, the (baby) yellow and blue dress (??!! ugh, colour scheme problem - well, it was a dream), or the shocking red ensemble. And, it wasn't a simple choice... I based the dresses on the black stocking that I was already wearing. Talk about putting an image on a background. My stocking was the blank canvass that needed something to go with it. Usually it was the other way around right? But no, not in my dream. The dress HAD to match the stocking I already chose.

OR THIS DRESS?
Photo from fashaddix.com

I guess in reality, we choose what we want based on a number of criteria: our mood, the event, what we have available, what is appropriate, what he have in our wardrobe. Really, that speaks more than just about dresses, mind you. It could mean principles in our chosen 'Lifestyle', career, home, etc. What is your "Stocking"? What is THE 'blank' canvass that you are choosing other things based on?

I wonder what I will dream about tonight.

Thanks to all sticker companies!

I must be on vacation ... 3 blog posts in one day! Let alone one morning! :) I am taking the half day off from work.

The little girl is dismantling stickers from her sticker book.. and sticking them.. on my leg !! Well, it keeps her entertained and busy. Lately, it's been all about stickers. I never realised these sticky things had magic! The size or shape does not matter (for now).

I can attest to their powers. Stickers kept the little girl busy --
... on our 7 1/2 hour day flight. She stuck them onto the airplane walls.
... hourly sunday mass.
... doctor visit, while waiting in clinics.
... while waiting for our food at restos.
... on the trolley cart while I do the grocery run - she would stick and unstick those brand stickers on fruits!
... pretty much anywhere.

Most of the time she un-sticks them and hands them over to me. For me to stick back onto the wall/chair/fruit/etc.

I now have added a pad of sticker in my bag :) In case of emergency.

Simple joy! :)

Ideally this would be me

Ya, ya ya, the picture I wish was me working at home. Poised, composed, neat.

But not!

Since officially starting work at home last week, I have been calm, but not poised. The house is a mess. I guess I am just about to make my (our) routine. Not as easy. A baby does not have the best routine. But I suppose that should not throw me off my goal. Working from home would work, and I will make sure it does.

Although it means being able to time my calls in B's good, silent moods. Checking and replying to emails quickly. Doing my research with one hand feeding B, while the other is typing away.

Well of course this only happens in the beginning. Things will be better. Before I know it the little one is not so little anymore, and I would have mastered the art of juggling my time. For now, I look at the photo above and feel hopeful that everything is possible. After all, (its my secret) I am supermom! Hahaha!

Tagaytay in my Dreams

In a rushed and often times stressful daily life that we live in, we sometimes come up with a private dream land where we go to when we need that one second refuge from reality. It is my family's recent trip to Tagaytay which I recall and relive. Even for just a moment.

I wonder what about our Tagaytay overnight trip made it so special. Was it because we stayed at the Discovery Country Suites and got pampered so much. Or, was it the lovely massage we had at Nurture Spa. Perhaps it was the Filipino luncheon we had there? Let me relive the moment..

At the Discovery Country Suites..
The minute we stepped into bliss, a refreshing drink welcomed us. Perfectly enjoyed by the table overlooking our home for the night. Breads, cheeses and wine (off limits for me though) delectable as can be. Hubby indulged, while I resisted a bit. Baby slept soundly in her capsule, giving hubby and I a bit of time to breathe in Tagaytay aroma and scenery. Our suite opened onto a great view of Taal lake, and the lush bed invited us to sleep in longer the next day. Our little one cooperated, all the way through breakfast by the same table that welcomed us the day before. Ah, the morning meal was the best. A number of choices that all appealed to us, and when our meals finally arrived we enjoyed every gram served. The quick tease of heaven ended too soon.

At Nurture Spa..
We arrived at the reception area with tense muscles, but as soon as the swishing of the breeze and humming of the wind reverberated through the afternoon sky we were instantly feeling more relaxed. We were dreaming of our own gazebo with high ceilings on a clear, breezy summer day. Plus personal masseuse. Calming. Relaxing. Perfect. Only for a good moment, we were able to enjoy serenity and the time while it lasted. It couldn't have been more perfect to end our special treatment with sweet and spicy warm tea. Perfect actually is a word that doesn't quite come close to how we felt at that time.

The food..
The food was great, as hubby and I enjoyed Filipino cuisine served to us any day, every day. Tagaytay offered us more than just dreams, but a chance to play pretend reality for a quick while.

We will be back. Soon. For now we will bottle up all the memory and seal it tight. Release a bit of that perfect scent every so often when we need rejuvinating from the real world.

Pre Christmas Blues again

I’ve been feeling the pre- Christmas blues lately as it would have been the time of the year when I would have planned to travel to Manila to give birth there. However, things have taken a big turn, and we’re having the baby here instead. Weighing pros and cons during my first trimester and deciding in the second trimester was not the easiest decision we had to make. Having said that though, having the baby here means we will have slightly more money to spend for gifts. Should we have pushed to go to Manila, we might have had to use the services of those emergency loan lenders. Now, we don’t have to! We do have a lot of things to buy for the nursery though, but I amidst my online baby shopping I have been checking out Christmas gifts for family back home. I have been busy preparing those Christmas cards to send, and my other endless list of items to buy for the apartment. I still cannot fully comprehend the fact that I will be giving birth in about two months time! I guess my Manila Christmas dreaming will have to be downplayed this year to give way to baby thoughts (I am not complaining!).

Same old thoughts

With all the things currently going on in the world market, is it wise to start a business? Or is it better to do a bit more of research and possibly just invest in gold or gold bullion? I am still just considering the options as to what to do. Although the latter may be attractive to some, I think I may opt to start my business. It has been a long while since I have been contemplating on this, and with my maternity leave coming up I may actually finally push through with it! It has been seriously lingering in my head, and hubby has been giving me pep talks about how much he believes I can make a big business flourish. I suppose when it all comes down to planning and pushing pens I will be raking my brain and doing my own market research. For now, its all about baby.

Trying times

There has been another wave of employment terminations at work, and to think the economy is meant to have been getting better. Who knows what that really means nowadays? I suppose it is so much more difficult particularly at this time of the year, as it gets closer to the holiday and supposedly festive season would be the worst possible time to lose one’s means of livelihood. People lose jobs because of cheap labour, and cost cutting measures practiced by businesses. It makes one wonder whether all these termination procedures are fair, or whether there are underlying reasons behind getting sacked from one’s job. I suppose a lot of it is treated on a case by case basis.

I know of two colleagues who would very much benefit from second wallet loans at this particular time. One of them has just bought a house, while the other one a car. They are quite young professionals and as much as they both have a lot of bigger things in store for them in the future, losing a job is not a nice predicament to be in at anytime. One can only wish for re-consideration or an alternative position to be available once redundancy takes effect.

Guess the baby's gender!?

To find out? Or not?

A month ago hubby and I went for my 19 week scan (ultrasound), and it is normally at that time in the pregnancy that one can find out the gender of the baby.

At work, people were volunteering their opinion about whether to find out the gender or not. Some of them were really old school and have said that for the first baby in the family, it is best to keep it a SURPRISE! I know two of the ladies who recently gave birth left the gender unknown until delivery day. It is pretty exciting I suppose. If you can stand to wait that long and not find out!!

A few other people have been asking me about the gender of our baby. Especially my Filipino friends :) I know in Manila, almost everyone finds out the gender as soon as it is possible! I don't think I know anyone who's opted to keep it a surprise.

Anyway, as of the moment, it is 50-50 still. Possibly a baby ballerina girl, or maybe a soccer playing boy. Months before the 19-week scan I was partial in wanting to find out baby's gender. Part of me wanted to go old school and not find out (hubby was fine whatever I decided on)... And then on the day of the scan, at the very last minute I asked the U/S technician. She said she thinks baby is a girl. As she couldn't see anything in between the legs. But then again, she did not want to confirm. She went on and said it could be a boy, and that she was unsure. SO there. Still 50-50. Unless the technician was really just playing safe.

Now, now, now... we still don't know really. Soon, we have to start baby shopping seriously and we will have to stick with the neutral colours... whites, yellows, light greens, baby blues. Honestly, I am not that fussed now to find out. I don't know when the next scan is. I might ask again if baby is in a better angle. Or, I might not ask. We'll see. Either way, hubby and I will be happy for as long as baby is healthy and normal.

Would you go old school and not find out baby's gender?

Kids at the workplace

Let me whinge for a bit.. Kids at the workplace.. They're so moody, always gossiping, talking about silly things.. Sometimes I don't mind. But sometimes they can get to me when I am not feeling up to it. With kids one would have to adjust to their level. Too much effort sometimes. They take something so small and make it a big deal. Ugh. Life is about other more important things you know. Hay. C'est La Vie.

Nice Sunday

It was a nice, nice sunday.. Still have a week left til winter is over, and we welcome spring, but the temperature hit 26 degrees! Lovely! Where else in the world can that happen?

Loving it..